everything changes and everything stays the same

Jacob, my first big love 10 years ago, was supposed to come for NYE, but didn't. His friend just sent me pictures from their night out and he looks so very sad. It breaks my heart.

I turned my phone on last night and 30 seconds later it's ringing his ring.

"Hey baby."

"I am in love with you. I have always been in love with you. I have been in love with you since the first day I met you. I am so sorry for anything I have ever done to hurt you. I am sorry for not being there when you needed me. I apologize for not being a good friend to you."

"Okay. I appreciate the sentiment," I manage to say with tears streaming down my face.

"That's what my note would say if I were to kill myself. I'm going to stick my head in my oven now."

* * * *
I'm finally getting around to it...Top 10 Albums of 2005

10 Decemberists--Picaresque
09 Sundayrunners--Sundayrunners
08 Death Cab for Cutie--Plans
07 Little Brazil--You and Me
06 Clap Your Hands Say Yeah--Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
05 Franz Ferdinand--You Could Have It So Much Better
04 Rogue Wave--Descended Like Vultures
03 The Perishers--Let There Be Morning
02 The National--Alligator
01 Aqualung--Strange & Beautiful

Other Noteworthy Albums:
Chemical Brothers--Push the Button
Imogen Heap--Speak for Yourself (Nov. release)

Other non-2005 Obsessions: Frou Frou & Mirah

Biggest Disappointment and I'm so Over Them Album: Coldplay X&Y

Favorite quote about one of my top 10 bands:
"Franz Ferdinand are the backstreet boys of indie rock."
~ Johnny Fabulous