It's just life
I want life in every word to the extent that it's absurd.


Monday, Jan. 24, 2005
I needed social interaction last night. I'd been in the house for 43 hours and was going stir crazy.

I'm not going to completely avoid THAT part of town for the rest of my life because of him. That's ridiculous. I wanted food and I wanted food from Elsa's. So, I went and conversed with a variety of people at several different locations and overall had a good time.

Of course he came into the bar I was at about 20 minutes before close. Of course he didn't even look at me and further more did not speak to me. And well, the same is true for me.

But it made me absolutely pyschocrazy. "How dare he not talk to me! This is so ridiculous!" was all that was going through my head. So what does the crazypsycho girl do in her slightly drunk state? She calls him--twice--no message thank god. Then I sent him a text message with, "This is ridiculous. We need to learn how to be friends because I'm tried of us ignoring each other. I miss you and I'm pretty sure you miss me too."

Crazypyscho girl, without any response from him, then proceeded to delete all means of finding his phone number on my phone. I refuse to be that stupid pyscho girl ever again.

Here's the thing...there was hardly anyone out last night because of the snow and cold and my car was clearly parked right in front of the bar. He knew I was there. And I thought about how many times this has been the case. So, if he didn't want to see me he didn't have to come into the bar. There was no reason for him to be there. He'd been next door all night with his friends and went back there after ignoring me until bar close.
Ack, ack, ackity ack.

I want him erased. Really I do.
If I just go get a Mocha Valencia from Starbucks everything will be okay.
8:45 a.m. ::
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