More fun than one person should be allowed.

This troubles my therapist.

I'm going through my days like nothing is wrong, when they're are these huge thunderstorm clouds circling above my head.

I have fun in any given situation--too many situations. Fun all the time. More fun than one person should be allowed.

All this fun because I do not want to deal with any of the core issues right now. If I pretend they don't exist...then they don't.

Having so much fun I don't want to go back to therapy and have to hear the horrible things she says to. Have to remember the horrible things she said to me yesterday. To look at the horrified face she was making as I divulged what my life has been the last couple of weeks.

I don't want to be me right now. But I don't know how else to be.